I sometimes wonder what it'd be like to be a father, have babies, but most of the time I think of babies having me. It's tragic to think like that, but the fact that I don't want to have babies is almost a service to society as well as the biggest manifestation for the unborn infants in the sense that if I think of my family as it is now and analyse their own parental background I come to an easy conclusion: I am ducked up this way because my parents were and are still broken shells of people who never got to realize their ultimate dream in life: Stop perpetuating the shit that their parents put them through, especially when considering that I had to hear my whole life "I wish my parents did this for me".
Dammit, is it just me who feels this is completely insane?!
Instead of actually paying attention to what your stupid child needs or wants, you (parents) are actually living your frustrations through your little suckers vicariously. I hate that. You hate that. We all hate that. Our parents hated that. And yet there they go, poor numbnuts repeating the very same mistakes they were running from so badly.
Yes, I'm a whiny baby and I'm deviating from my own responsibilities by projecting them onto my parents.
I'm not just whining. I'm actually fighting this perpetuating curse and saying that I'm not having any children exactely because I acknowledge that they'd be far worse off than me, given that I'm twisted in the wrong ways a lot like my parents are, only for different reasons. No, I say. This family ends with me and whatever God there may be bears witness to me and kinda agrees if you think about it. If you know me well you understand what I meant.
So, babies, away from me!
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